Lynette George

A popular Web site offers virtual farms. Just like a real farm (without the actual output of manual labor and cash), we virtual farm owners plow, plant, harvest and sell crops; milk the cows and goats; gather eggs; pet the cats and dogs; and tend to the pigs, sheep, rabbits and ducks.

We use the virtual money from our crops and fruit trees to purchase the things we need on our little farms -- houses, barns, wells, equipment, ponds, fruit stands, decorative items, and such. We also have to invite our Web site friends to become our "neighbors" at our farms, and each day we send gifts to those neighbors as well as visit their farms and help them pull weeds, water or fertilize.

Just like in real life, we can even "hire" folks to help on our farms and we, in turn, can hire ourselves out, earning extra virtual money and experience points. By the time I finish all the plowing, planting, milking and harvesting, I'm completely worn out! If virtual farming is this tough, the real thing would kill me within 15 minutes!

When my spouse, Roger, first caught me plowing away on one of my farms, he laughed.

"I can't believe you're actually doing that," Roger said, then shook his head and walked off.

Yet, he started watching me more closely as I clicked my way through potatoes, grapes, pumpkins, wheat, apples, oranges, peaches and the like. Several friends and family members got the farming bug and our conversations centered on our crops and animals. Roger couldn't stand being left out, so he started his own farm.

Little did I know it would create a monster. It only took him a couple of days to get addicted. Our schedule suddenly revolved around his farms.

"Oh man, we'd better get home. My poinsettias have got to be harvested at 11 p.m. or I'll lose them," Roger would insist. And even worse, "Sorry, but tell them we're going to be late, I'm harvesting one of my neighbor's crops and it's a really big field!"

What's worse, we and our gang aren't the only ones. Many of my co-workers also have farms, so we trade farming secrets, hints and information; compare our farms; and express our shared sadness when one of us accidentally loses a crop. Anyone not in the farming loop but overhearing our conversations would swear we're full-fledged, big-time farmers.

I can hear it now. The collective sigh of all the area's real farmers, wishing it were as simple as the click of a mouse.

Happy birthday to Ray Vaughn, Dayle Cantrell, Bobby Luke, Rose Jones, Carla Louann Anderson, Iesha Medford and Michael Duane Holder, all of Sherman; Leah Martindale of Corpus Christi; Jack Minter of San Antonio; Charles Kennedy Broome; and Valerie Freels, Cody Palmore, Debora Jones and Susan Kullen, all of Denison.

Happy anniversary to Don and Frances Akin of Sanger, 55 years; Stephen and Julie Kee of Tom Bean, 16 years; and Frank and Fay Sigmund of Pottsboro, 13 years.